My Brother Jack Suffers a Stroke
A family crisis puts many things in perspective. Jack McGrath suffers a stroke, Mary McGrath, a regular contributor, writes about it.
I got the call in the thick of night while on vacation in Florida.
“Jack’s had a stroke,” wailed my twin sister Teresa. It felt like it was 3 a.m., but it was actually 6:30. Even in a crisis, my sister remained considerate to deliver the news.
It was surreal. My mind stumbled like I was starring in some Stephen King movie as I tried to decipher the message. I took the mobile phone into the living room and tried to focus on what was happening. Stroke? No way. I’m dreaming and haven’t woken up yet.
But this was no dream, and it was happening to my brother Jack, who just moved to Port Hueneme with his wife Pauline whose fair British complexion had tired of the brutal summers of Studio City. About 10 minutes south of Oxnard, the move there was to ease into a better way of life, a better way of living.
My twin sister became the point person in our family, since I was out of town. Teresa is an expert in our family when it comes to medical issues, and she was instrumental in helping us understand what was happening.
Over the next 48 hours, we monitored his situation via emails, phone calls, and whatever communication was necessary to impart his progress.
Should we fly in and get to him as soon as possible? Should we wait and let him rest? How much news should be dispensed to family and friends? What was the role of privacy in these types of situations? But most of all is he going to live?
We’ve all dealt with family emergencies. The last major family challenge we had was when my mother was diagnosed with lung cancer in 1999. Every morning I would awaken with this cloudy feeling of dread, and here I am again, dealing with another catastrophic situation. My sister Teresa coordinated our schedules, and soon, we were all headed to Port Hueneme.
Over the past few days, we have visited with my brother and his wife Pauline, and thankfully, my brother is doing very well. We took walks on the beach, shared some lovely meals, and memories. It was truly a poignant and meaningful family reunion.
Thankfully, it was only a minor stroke, and unless you knew him well, you’d never guess that a week ago, we wondered if we were going to lose another family member.
You see, my brother is a fighter. In more ways than one, he is a trooper, a true testament to the will of survival, and succeeding over adversity.
Growing up in Studio City, my brother was a football player, a baseball champion, and has been competitive in any endeavor he has undertaken. And this is the part of his character that I’m sure has come into play in a situation like this, where will can triumph over any difficult challenge.
I’m so thankful to his wife Pauline for managing this crisis in true heroic fashion. I thank my twin sister Teresa for being the point person in getting the family together to visit him in Port Hueneme. I thank whatever powers came into play to ensure his survival. Call it faith, the supernatural, positive thinking or all of you who extended their concern, prayers and well wishes.
My brother is alive and well, and on the road to recovery.
I can breathe again.
Send your well wishings to Jack in the COMMENTs area below and we'll make sure he sees them. Have a story to share?
Tell us in the comments.
Craig Clough
11:56 am on Saturday, February 11, 2012
My thoughts and prayers are with Jack and the McGrath family. Jack has been a great friend to me and so supportive of the work I have done here at Patch. I'm thankful to know he is on the road to recovery.
Mary McGrath
12:08 pm on Saturday, February 11, 2012
It was a close call Craig, and a reminder to all of us about the value of living. Thank you for your post.
Miki Henderson
1:22 pm on Saturday, February 11, 2012
My thoughts are with you Jack. I met you at Mike and Craig's wonderful party at the Federal before you moved away, and I thought what a loss for Patch it was that you were moving. Anyway, heel well, and keep them honest on Patch! Bless you!
Linda Rubin
2:41 pm on Saturday, February 11, 2012
Wishing Jack a "refuah shlemah," a complete and speedy recovery.l
Mark Hussey
8:10 am on Sunday, February 12, 2012
Is this Hebrew phrase akin to: "refusing to be a schlemiel?"
teresa mcgrath
2:57 pm on Saturday, February 11, 2012
fine article mary....thx for your help during the initial crisis and aftermath....it was a family reunion comprised of both grief and happiness .....we're so relieved jack is on the mend, and as he progresses thru his physical therapy and speech therapy...thx for all your kind thoughts of jack and our family....
Mary McGrath
3:44 pm on Saturday, February 11, 2012
Thank you and Nat and Lynn for all you've done over the past several days. The three of you are so informed in the medical field, that it made this ordeal less scary. It was hard being all the way in Florida, and I so appreciate how you held it together Teresa. I know it wasn't easy. Pauline is a real strong woman too, and Jack is lucky to have her care and devotion.
teresa mcgrath
6:02 pm on Saturday, February 11, 2012
pauline, nat, and lynn thx, you are great
Mark Hussey
8:35 pm on Saturday, February 11, 2012
Mary, not only is Jack a fighter and a trooper, as you said, and an exemplar of how to survive in the face of adversity--but he is also the former President of Studio City's Chamber of Commerce, and a larger than life personality who is loved and admired by many. He is also my first cousin, and I'm just so glad that his diagnosis AND prognosis are both way better than we were imagining last week when we first got the sobering news about his stroke! It was great to talk with him on the phone earlier today and to hear him laugh and even crack a few jokes about his health. Now it almost sounds like Jack had a "near-stroke" experience, which may have also been an out of body experience too--since he didn't know who he was for a day or so! Thanks for your timely and candid article. And just how do you get your teeth so white? Warm regards, Cousin Mark in New York--the Land of Jeremy Lin and the New York Knicks!!
Mary McGrath
9:17 pm on Saturday, February 11, 2012
When I heard he was flirting with the nurses, I knew he was on the road to recovery. And as for my teeth...baking soda...Glad you liked the article. Appreciate your feedback. I hear you and Jack were separated at birth. I guess you kicked Lynn out of the womb.
Susan Martin
10:36 pm on Saturday, February 11, 2012
Our love and good wishes are with Jack. It can be so scary to have experienced a stroke.It awakens us to how precious our lives are and to make the most of every day, in gratitude, joy and love. You're an amazing guy Jack. Love to you.
Susan, Peter and Nick Martin
Mary McGrath
6:16 am on Sunday, February 12, 2012
Thank you Susan. I'm sure Jack will appreciate your message.
Terry Anderson
11:39 pm on Saturday, February 11, 2012
Hey Jack ...we need you back...in full swing. Jack McGrath is probably the best humored fellow that i have ever known and there is always more than a few laughts with Jack. Plus a very astute political observer and a tireless worker. More than ever, my best to you and Pauline. A great guy.
Mary McGrath
6:16 am on Sunday, February 12, 2012
Thank you for your post and support Terry-
John J. Nazarian
11:59 pm on Saturday, February 11, 2012
My very best wishes go out to you and your family.....as we are all growing older these things are just terrible to have to deal with. I speak from lots of experience......
I hope things get better.....
John
Mary McGrath
6:15 am on Sunday, February 12, 2012
Thank you John for your kind words.
teresa mcgrath
3:43 am on Sunday, February 12, 2012
hey cousin mark, jack feels like you are a brother too...his humor is in full swing, so beware...thx to all for the warm regards for brother jack....
Irene DeBlasio
6:20 am on Sunday, February 12, 2012
Mary,
We're all praying for Jack's recovery. Our prayers should certainly help -- he's got the greater portion of Studio City and the San Fernando Valley rooting for him. Blessings and Hugs to Jack and your whole family.
Mary McGrath
6:23 am on Sunday, February 12, 2012
Thank you Irene. My brother is a trooper and all the love and support he's received has really boosted his spirits.
Laura Sladicka
8:14 am on Sunday, February 12, 2012
Jack as been a regular guest at Spark Woodfire Grill for years. Our thoughts and prayers go out to Jack for a speedy recovery. From the Spark team.
Mary McGrath
9:36 am on Sunday, February 12, 2012
Thank you in advance from my brother...I know he greatly appreciates all the love and support everyone has extended to him.
Joe Goodman
8:24 am on Sunday, February 12, 2012
All the best to Jack...glad to hear he is recovering.
Mary McGrath
9:36 am on Sunday, February 12, 2012
Thank you Joe...hope all is well with you!
E.M. Fredric
8:40 am on Sunday, February 12, 2012
Your brother's stamina, drive and humorous heart has both delighted and ticked off while helping making many changes in this community. May he 'tick' on for many more moons to come. We miss ya, Jack.
Mary McGrath
9:37 am on Sunday, February 12, 2012
He's a volcano of a person, as you know!
Gary Aminoff
11:07 am on Sunday, February 12, 2012
Mary, so glad your brother is on the way to recovery. Your excellent writing skills made the story made the story very real. I wish him a speedy and complete recovery.
Mary McGrath
11:35 am on Sunday, February 12, 2012
Thank you Gary....I'm glad to have my brother alive and to share this painful ordeal. I hope many can relate to it to find solace and inspiration.
Cathy Flynn
7:57 pm on Sunday, February 12, 2012
I am not surprised that Jack is already up and about. I think it'll take more than a stroke to knock down this tiger. Please give him my best. My prayers go out to him and the rest of your family for a complete recovery.
Mary McGrath
8:51 pm on Sunday, February 12, 2012
Yes, Jack is a fighter, and this is just another challenge...he's doing well!
teresa mcgrath
7:12 am on Monday, February 13, 2012
jack is a supreme fighter...spoke to him again yesterday, and he is progressing