It's weeks before Christmas and Santa's preparing
A wish list of goodies with great thought and caring.
We have some suggestions we'd like to impart,
We certainly hope that he'll take them to heart.
John Boehner? That's easy...we know what he needs.
Forget the Merlot and the blue worry beads.
He sure needs testicular fortitude
Instead of displaying his fake gratitude.
Hillary's cool and doesn't need much:
Hair, makeup, wardrobe, a finishing touch.
Senator Reid, OMG I'm confessin'
We need to donate a speech therapy lesson.
Is it me? I don't know -- we can't hear what you say.
Hey, you know what? Maybe it's better that way.
Yoko Ono is back -- can we send her away?
To her own private island? Can we do it today?
Hello Kitty paintbox? Nothing's too good.
We'll help her pack. Is she gone? Knock wood!
Matt Lauer is sour The millions he's paid?
He needs to go home and make lemonade.
Paul Krugman delights his readers each day
With the dismal facts about how we will pay
For mistakes in the past and all that mush.
No matter what happens he still blames George Bush.
A pencil-thin mustache for Prexy's disguise
When he boards Air Force One and takes to the skies.
Can we make him stay home? We've a country to save.
It's the land of the free and the home of the brave.