2013 promises new beginnings. We make New Year's Resolutions in the
hope of improving our lives. A resolution is basically a commitment to achieve certain goals. Even though 88% of us fail to keep resolutions we go through the same routine year after year in order to: stop harmful habits, to live healthier, more productive lives and become nicer, happier people. The most common goals are to lose weight, exercise more, pay off debts, stop smoking or drinking,
stop biting nails, learn a new language, volunteer and make new friends.
In the spirit of hope for a healthy and happy New Year we are making
suggestions based upon the news events of 2012. We would like to see these changes come about.
Congress - We will show up for work on time and try to be responsible,
honest, efficient and productive. We will stop renaming post offices, passing useless new laws, obey the ones we have and stop leaving everything until the last minute. We will try to be more cooperative and responsive to the needs of the country.
President - I resolve to curb my spending. Sometimes things that seem to
be too good to be true really are. Remember Solyndra.
General Petraeus - Next time I choose a mistress, it'll be one who can keep
her mouth shut.
Sandra Fluke - I will try to stop talking about my sex life at conventions.
Tom Cruise - I must stop marrying every woman I like.
Joe Biden - I resolve to think before I speak.
Clint Eastwood - I'll try to stop talking to furniture.
Mitt Romney - I resolve to get 47% more people to like me.
Mark Zuckerburg - I will be more selective and stop "liking" everybody on the
Lance Armstrong - Just Say No!
Bashar al-Assad - I'll make an effort to stop killing my own people.
Psy - I promise to think of a new dance that drives eveyone crazy and will have
more hits on youtube than Gangnam-style.