BIG CURVY LOVE- The Curvy Chronicles

Dear Curvy Girl,

I’m what you refer to as a “Plus Size Primadonna.”  I recently started the online dating thing in Studio City and though I wouldn’t have any luck because i’m a big girl but its the opposite.  So far I’ve gone on 12 dates!  The first guy wasn’t that great in bed.  I’ve tried to stop him contacting me but he keeps texting for booty calls (attached). 

The other guy was nice but I didn’t feel a spark so the next day I sent him this text.

I thought that was the end of it and two weeks later he’s texted me again! After all this I haven’t been on any more online dates. All these guys keep wanting to date me even though I’ve clearly said no. What am I doing wrong?

Signed,

Online Dating Dummy

————————————————

Dear ODD, 

I see you’re using the “Churn and Burn” online dating method previously  known as “The Numbers Game.”  Much like your local delicatessen we’ll need to utilize a number system to keep track of your man meat.  

Guy#1- 50 Shades of Bad SEX

WOW!  I’m loving his sexting skills and reckon if this message was delivered into my Fifi Inbox then I’d be dropping my plus-size-panties immediately!  You say he’s “bad in bed” could it simply be an operator error? With sexy texts like those, many women would be willing to haul their cookies down a dark alley to find out if he can back up his words with orgasmic actions. After all, most men need a little direction here and there. Could he be trained?  You say nothing of your attraction to 50 Shades and since he’s fed your kitty twice it seems there was attraction there at some point. 

How specific were you in the  “I don’t want to date you anymore?” texts?  You’re flirty little ”sounds fun but not tonight” and “ha ha ha I’ll let you know” suggests there WILL be another night of albeit bad erotic rendezvous. Seems you’re leading on this bad-in-bed boy so if you REALLY don’t want to ride that salami train again you need to be literal otherwise 50 Shades will continue to think its all part of the come-get-me-so-I-can-cum-again game!

Guy#2- Nice Guys Finish Last

Frankly i’m surprised Mr. Nice didn’t break up with you after your  ”It’s its just ‘nog’ me” text! That would be instant dismissal from my dating pool. However, it does appear you learnt from your 50 Shades of Bad Sexperience and outright told Mr Nice that you’re nog interested. I can only explain your situation by assuming you’re a stunning, intelligent and interesting voluptuous gal. That and   these guys seriously love the vibe of your Va Jay Jay.

I’m sorry none of your 12 dates have worked out ODD. Assuming your auto correct doesn’t screw you again then the  Mr Nice breakup text was a indeed nice standard form letter way to do the “I don’t want to see you again” text. As far as break up texts go you are doing nothing wrong.

Don’t let guys WANTING  to date you again deter you from dating new contenders. Take it as a positive sign on your quest for Big Curvy Love.   Think of it  like a job interview. They all really want  to make it to round two.  Its just that you haven’t found the right employee yet in which case maybe you need to review their resumes more before fronting up in person for a one-on-one. He’s out there!! Line yourself up more dates, assign them the next number in your dating roster and go again girl.

*In the meantime please send through 50 Shades of Bad Sex’s phone number. I know someone who could use a good sexting.

Yous in Big Curvy Love,

The Curvy Girl

Need some advice of your own? click HERE to contact the Curvy Girl.

For more posts like these visit my website: www.bigcurvylove.com and like on facebook for updates https://www.facebook.com/BigCurvyLove