Do you enjoy the adrenaline and intensity behind fighting? Do you thrive on the false perception of power, assuming you’re right and your partner is wrong? Are you a couple constantly in crisis?
Do you pride yourself on being an ace at confrontation or do you prefer peace and harmony, aiming to resolve conflict at any cost?
Can you let petty differences go or do you make mountains out of molehills? Do you live by the principle that most spats are trivial or do you consider every quarrel a make it or break it?
How important is your stance in the scheme of things? Will you remember five years, five months, or five minutes from now what the argument was about?
Do you get caught up in “he said, she said?” Have you been told you’d make a good lawyer, are unrelentingly convincing, and thus, would be a ball buster in the courtroom?
Can you conceive of taking the high road and letting your mate off the chopping block? Is it difficult for you to admit mistakes and learn from unpleasant encounters?
Do you believe the guilty have to prove their innocence beyond a reasonable doubt? Conversely, do you revel in the fact that the faultless can rest assured without having to engage or establish freedom from culpability?
The choice of standing your ground versus retreating is often a huge dilemma and the crux between a healthy and a toxic connection. It’s adamant during disagreements to remain flexible and open minded in order to hear and acknowledge disparate perspectives.
In successful liaisons, parties profess a knack for rising above a turbulent situation to a level of acceptance that humans are fallible. Letting go of perfection in your paramour is crucial. Nitpicking and focusing on flaws and blunders is counterproductive.
Practice using “I” statements. Personal sentiments aren’t subject to interpretation or negotiation. When pointing the finger at your beloved with “you” remarks, three fingers are pointed back at you.
Your dearest is in your life to act as a reflection, mirroring the deep, damaged parts of you that call for healing. Staying conscious and aware will allow you to recognize the meaningful messages and insights presented to you through variances.
The shortcomings in your sweetheart that particularly bother you are precisely the traits within, screaming for attention, should you summon up the courage to face them.
Everything is a gift or a lesson. When discord appears, it’s a sign there’s something to discover internally, e.g. a defect to purge; a characteristic to modify; an attitude to adjust. If you opt to welcome the challenge, you gain an opportunity to grow and transform.
The secret to a happy liaison lies in trying. Never give up. Just hanging in there through thick and thin is the greatest indication of honor and respect you can bequeath your paramour.
A quick and surefire way to circumvent hostility and deescalate a brawl is to apologize. This applies whether or not you are to blame. Each party contributes a share to a skirmish, albeit yours may be only 1% compared to their 99%.
You can cut a clash midstream by saying “I’m sorry you’re upset. I care about you. I’m confident we can find a common ground.”
Shia La Beouf recently sent an email to Alec Baldwin, his former Broadway co-star, concerning an apparent falling out. “A (real) man can tell you he was wrong…He can apologize, even if sometimes it’s just to put an end to the bickering. Alec, I’m sorry for my part of a disagreeable situation.” (Per Page Six of the NY Post 2-20-13)
It’s best to arrange anger by appointment. Attempting to resolve conflict while emotions are raging is ineffective.
Take a self imposed “time out.” Go for a walk. Write the object of your affection an “unsent love letter” expressing why you’re mad, why you’re sad, what you wish for, and how important he/she is to you.
Only after the storm subsides are clarity and composure likely to prevail. Ponder plans for fun, especially following discussions on touchy subjects.
Better yet, don’t sweat the small stuff. Life is too short to scuffle over petty matters, and they’re all frivolous matters.
It takes two to tango. You’ll get more mileage enrolling in a hot, sizzling, sexy, romantic tango class together, than in combat on the battlefield.
Singles Slogan for the Week: Dream as if you’ll live forever. Live as if you’ll die today.
Single in Studio City Picks for the Top Twelve 2013 Academy Awards Categories:
Best Picture: Should Win: Django Unchained; Will Win: Argo
Best Director: Should Win: Ben Affleck or Quentin Tarantino (Oh, wait, neither were nominated. What were they thinking? Director’s branch - Wake up and smell the hummus!) Will Win: Steven Spielberg, Lincoln
Best Actor: Should Win: Denzel Washington, Flight; Will Win: Daniel Day Lewis, Lincoln
Best Actress: Should Win: Naomi Watts, The Impossible; Will Win: Jessica Chastain, Zero Dark Thirty
Best Supporting Actor: Should Win: Christoph Waltz, Django Unchained; Will Win: Tommy Lee Jones, Lincoln
Best Supporting Actress: Should Win: Helen Hunt, The Sessions; Will Win: Anne Hathaway, Les Miserables:
Best Original Screenplay: Should Win: Quentin Tarantino, Django Unchained; Will Win: Mark Boal, Zero Dark Thirty
Best Adapted Screenplay: Should Win: Chris Terrio, Argo; Will Win: Chris Terrio, Argo
Best Animated Feature: Should Win: Wreck-It Ralph; Will Win: Wreck-It Ralph
Best Foreign Language Film: Should Win: Amour; Will Win: Amour
Best Documentary: Should Win: Searching for Sugar Man; Will Win: Searching for Sugar Man
Best Original Song: Should Win: “Skyfall,” Skyfall; Will Win: “Skyfall,” Skyfall
V-Day Studio City is as excited as ever since Vagina Season is rapidly approaching and they’ll be doing what they crave…empowering women and working in concert to bring a collective end to violence. They're staging a very fervent battle, and need your help in achieving this goal.
V-Day Studio City's production of The Vagina Monologues is set to run April 19-21 at Two Roads Theatre but their operating costs have immensely increased. In order to give back as much as they possibly can, they've begun a campaign via Kickstarter to raise funds to assuage these new expenses.
By donating to V-Day Studio City through Kickstarter, you can receive several perks (free tickets, merchandise, etc) while aiding the Vagina Warriors in reaching their fundraising objective.
Please visit http://kck.st/XXgOF3 for more information and to contribute! Thank you in advance, Vagina supporters, for your dedication and commitment to this worthy cause. V-Day Studio City looks forward to seeing you at the show in April!
Tickets for The Vagina Monologues can be purchased at http://www.ticketweb.com/snl/EventListings.action?orgId=170573