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Single in Studio City: Friends Are First, Foremost and Forever

Are you a fair weather friend, only available when you’re not in a romantic relationship? Do you cancel plans with your buds if the man/woman of your dreams asks you out at the last minute?

Have you noticed that your friendships endure beyond involvements with significant others? Lovers may come and go but true friends are eternal. That’s why it’s crucial to nurture those in your support system whether or not you’re engaged in a passionate bond.

Although it may take some juggling and tweaking, there are many approaches to keeping the fires burning with your pals. Some methods entail including your friends with your sweetheart whenever possible and keeping in touch on a daily basis, not just when you’re in boyfriend/girlfriend crisis.

You can also make sure your bff doesn’t feel like a third wheel by saving intense kissing hugging, fondling, and other PDA’s for more private moments. There’s a time and place for everything. 

If you sense you’re in the middle, let go of control and allow your bestie and beloved to work out issues between themselves. It will give them the dignity they crave and remind them how much you respect and believe in their capabilities.

Whatever you do, never pit your bff and sweetie against one another or badmouth either behind their back. That only creates hostility which will appear consciously or subconsciously in subsequent interchanges.

As long as your mate knows how treasured your friends are to you, and you’re in a healthy union, it ought to be a slam dunk. He/she will want to accommodate your needs by treating you and your friends with the utmost regard.

It’s easy to get sucked into the excitement of a new tryst, especially at the beginning when you desire to be with that special someone 24/7. That’s when it’s particularly crucial to recollect that friends are forever, while an intimate rendezvous may be fleeting.

When you’re smitten with the love bug, it’s adamant to consider that your bff’s will be there for the long haul, through thick and thin. Neglecting them will leave you high and dry if you ever do have to go through the dreaded breakup. Check in frequently to acknowledge how meaningful and precious your friendship is.  

Put yourself in your best friend’s shoes. When you're in this thrilling, fascinating, all consuming association, it can seem as if they’re losing what the two of you have. Abandonment quandaries may be looming. Imagine what it’s like with your new paramour always in the picture, at every event, constantly hearing about him/her, ad infinitum.

If you’re the bff, there are a myriad of things you can do to not feel isolated. Get to know the intended because chances are you have more in common than you realize. With this stance, you’re less inclined to experience envy and jealousy.

You can revel in the enthusiasm as well. Their joy could be your pleasure, rather than looking at it as your loss. Bear in mind how much you care and therefore, want this duo to find happiness and bliss.  

The more you back your starry-eyed friend, the more ready and willing you’ll be to attract your own adoring partner. Instead of perceiving the glass as half empty, observe your cup overflowing with affection.

In spite of the fact that you may be spending less time with your solo bff, remind them often how irreplaceable they are. Tell them flat out that they’re still extremely essential and a priority in your life and no third party will ever change that.

Reassure them of the maxim that the more love you have in your life, the more room you have for love in your life.

What about when your bff is a member of the opposite sex? How do you deal with unfounded resentment, distrust, and heightened suspicions?

Can a female maintain ties with a male comrade without her main squeeze’s blessing? Similarly, is it possible for a guy to stay chummy with a gal when he’s engaged in an amorous link with a woman who’s insecure?

It may take some finesse to make sure there’s no animosity. A key practice is to refrain from surreptitious meetings, texting, or phone calls without your babe’s awareness. Secrecy could be the straw that breaks the camel’s back and causes irretrievable damage to the doting connection you covet.

Many think it’s not possible to have platonic friendships with members of the opposite sex and believe there’s probably one party with ulterior motives. See the film, “When Harry Met Sally” confirming that viewpoint.

Bottom line: Cultivate your friendships as you would your personal, precious garden and your life will blossom and flourish two fold.

Singles Goal for the Week: Reveal to a close confidante how valuable they are to you and how much you appreciate and cherish their inimitable camaraderie.

This Wednesday October 31st is Halloween! Grab your bff’s, happily ever after’s, acquaintances, relatives, promising candidates and bring them to a FREE soiree at El Torito Grill, 9595 Wilshire Blvd., Beverly Hills, 7-10pm.  Host Dr. Dan, has been throwing free singles events for over 25 years.

This may be the last complimentary gathering of its kind unless we can pack the place, so spread the word and let’s continue fantastic celebrations at no charge. There have been countless hookups at these get-togethers. Numerous couples are enjoying peace and harmony, after meeting at a Dr. Dan soiree.

You’ll have loads of choices from this friendly group of classy, upscale, interesting bachelor/bachelorettes. Your heart may go pitter patter, skip a beat and perhaps the man/woman of your dreams will tickle your fancy.

Costumes are optional, clothing mandatory…but hey here’s a chance to don an actual mask and let the unique personality in you shine through, to everyone's amazement. There’ll be plenty of dancing, schmoozing, grooving, and mingling.

Ample street parking, no host bar, appetizers, and dinner.

NancyNelson October 29, 2012 at 11:34 AM
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Barbara Krause October 29, 2012 at 12:41 PM
I have always believed that it is short sighted for people to be inconsistent with their friends when in a relationship whether it lasts a month or forever.
salwar kameez November 26, 2012 at 07:30 AM
Friendship is Love with jewels on, but without either flowers or veil. ~Augustus William Hare and Julius Charles Hare, Guesses at Truth, by Two Brothers, 1827 http://rajasthanispecial.com/index.php/womens-collection/salwar-kameez.html

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