Holidays, Homeland, and 4 Boys Like My Daughter

I don't know what has my head spinning the most—the fact that it's already Thanksgiving and 103.5 is playing Christmas songs, that I finally watched the entire first season of "Homeland" and I go to bed thinking that Mandy Patinkin is truly the only person I can trust, or the revelation that four 10-year-old boys have crushes on my daughter.

Who am I kidding? The latter, of course.

Now, I have told you all many times that my kid has zero interest in boys. Zip. Nada. While many of her friends are busy texting boys and passing notes, my daughter still thinks it's all, well,

Lame, mommy.

However, it never occurred to me that, even though she isn't curious at all about that stuff out there circling around the teather-ball and handball court, boys, in fact, FOUR OF THEM, are curious about my girl.

I discovered this when I heard my daughter's cell phone ring. It was an alert that a text was coming in.

Just to show you how not into any of this my kid is, she never even checks her phone. It lives in her backpack and is only pulled out when she needs to call her dad or me.

So, she's on the couch drawing and I'm in the kitchen cooking when I hear the beep sound. I go get her phone and it reads,

who are u going to dance with at culmination?

No name, just a phone number.

Bunny? You got a text.

I hand her the phone, she looks at it, then tosses it aside and continues drawing. That's it?

Honey, who was that?

A boy at school. He has a crush on me.

Now, most moms might smile and go back to what they're doing, seeing that their sweet little girl is enjoying drawing and not texting. But not this mom. I was more awake than I had been in months.

Really? A boy has a crush on you? 

Yeah, mom. Actually, four boys do.

And that's when I suddenly went from cool, collected mom to "ohmygod tell me everything while I grab my coffee and curl up on the couch and hold on to your every word as we share this pivotal mother-daughter moment" mom.

Who are they? When did this start? How do you know? Why the hell haven't you told me?! Who are their parents and are they Republicans or Democrats?!

Hmm, perhaps she didn't tell me because she was worried I would act like a complete spaz. She would be correct.

Mom, it's no big deal. Ever since we found out we have to dance at graduation that's all everyone talks about at the lunch benches. Who are you dancing with? Who wants to dance with who? Blah, blah, blah. It's annoying.

I was in heaven listening to this. I don't know why, but this was our first boy conversation and it felt incredibly special. Until... she went back to drawing. No, no, no! We're not done here, honey! This is a moment. Our moment!

Do you like any of them, baby?

As friends, but... eww, no.

Really?

No.

Are you going to answer his text?

I wasn't planning on it.

And then she looked at me, and handed me the phone.

But it sounds like you want to.

And she laughed.

I actually blushed from embarrassment. Realizing, once again, that my daughter is nothing like me when it comes to boys. Nothing. Thank God.

At her age I was the one chasing them around the playground and that chase kept going for many years. What was I chasing? What did I think I needed to make me feel OK with myself? What enormous hole was I hoping to fill?

I was missing so much. Broken in so many ways. I would have given anything to have four boys want to dance with me.

But my kid is whole. She feels OK with herself. More than OK. She has no need to chase because she has everything inside her that matters. No broken parts.

I looked at her, and gave her a kiss.

I'm not surprised the boys have crushes on you, honey. Not one bit.

And as she went back to drawing I returned her phone to her backpack where it lives, smiling as we ignored the alerts as they continued to come in.

That's right... let them chase her.