Are you honestly aching to be with your former sweetheart and or is it merely the idea of an affectionate association? Are you more concerned with the chase and winning the prize?
Have you forgotten all the negative qualities and uncomfortable sentiments you experienced i.e. the initial reasons prompting separation? Are you only focusing on the positive attributes and encounters?
What are you really craving? Is it that piece of you that emerges when you’re in an intimate union? Do you admire and treasure the individual you become when you’re linked to the man/woman of your dreams?
Why is it you yearn to find that special someone? Is it because when you’re in love, the most confident, creative, caring parts of you are exposed? In other words, if the match is genuine, the best in you is revealed.
What happens if you realize you made a mistake and want to reunite with your ex? What are the chances this can work? Does distance apart dissolve disagreements while lessons learned make for a brighter and deeper attachment?
Maybe it was a timing issue e.g. he was recently out of a long marriage, she was in the middle of a lucrative business venture. If you’re soulmates, does it matter whether you haven’t been an item for weeks, months, even years? Can the perfect couple survive several supplementary alliances in the interim?
Is there a difference if you split on good terms or bad? Can the mending of broken hearts and repairing of painful occurrences be so arduous that reconciliation is a lost cause? How can you discern when there’s too much water under the bridge?
Should you look up preceding boyfriends/girlfriends and consider their current eligibility factor? Does your desire to team up again stem from loneliness and desperation, or because you’re convinced you’re a duo made in heaven?
Contemplate the extent of your expectations? Do you sincerely believe you’re meant to be a pair or are you still wishing and hoping he/she has changed to fit your mold?
Are you done playing the field, ready to give up the game, willing to commit and make the partnership a priority? Are you prepared to let go of acrimony?
A relevant definition of resentment is ‘to drink the poison and expect the other person to die.’ The one who carries the wrath is the one who suffers. If you radiate antagonism, you will attract the same and the probability of a harmonious and healthy link is nil.
Have you frequently stumbled upon men who seem to hate women and vice versa? This kind outlook is an affection adulterate, a romance ruiner, a passion pollutant.
For those of you searching for Mr./Ms. Right, ponder how you view and interpret your prior amorous connections. Are you friends with your exes or do you harbor bitter sentiments? Do you remain in touch and treat each other respectfully or is there mainly hostility and contempt?
You can determine the caliber of your prospect’s character by the manner in which they deal with and describe their previous involvements. It’s a turn off to hear a man/woman gripe and complain about disastrous relationships.
How often have you heard your babe go on and on about what a jerk their husband/wife was? Don’t anticipate seducing your beloved with that glum attitude.
The quickest way to destroy the likelihood of a meaningful bond is to exude anger towards past liaisons. Of course it’s impossible to hide such a powerful emotion. Therefore, it behooves you to let go, forgive and forget, and process the ire that binds you, before returning to the dating pool.
Which party should make the initial move, opening the door to settlement, accord, and understanding? Don’t stand on ceremony due to fear of taking the plunge. Let your inner courage and strength arise. There’s amazing power and freedom in vulnerability. In addition it’s superbly sexy, alluring, enticing, and seductive.
Should your fresh conciliation include parameters, stipulations, and mutually agreeable compromises where both participants feel valued, appreciated, and acknowledged. Isn’t that what significant and nurturing communication is about in the first place?
Whilst mulling over these concepts, achieve a good laugh and/or cry by renting the DVD, “Young Adult” to observe Charlize Theron’s attempts at stealing her high school honey away from his spouse.
Locate “Sex in the City” episodes where Carrie and Mr. Big finally rally, following many moons and seemingly serious attachments with members of the opposite sex.
Singles Slogan for the Week: “I cannot give you the formula for success, but I can give you the formula for failure – which is: Try to please everybody.” (Herbert Bayard Swope)
June is the perfect month to hook up with the new or old apple of your eye. As summertime approaches there are loads of exciting activities for you to embark on either solo, with your bff, or potential pal.
On Tuesday June 12th you may conceivably meet the love of your life at any of these free affairs: swing dancing to a live band at Joe’s American Bar and Grill in Burbank at 9p ($5 lesson at 8:30p); Jazz and Wine in the courtyard at Hollywood and Highland from 7-9p, produced by KJAZZ 88.1 FM Radio, featuring Latin artist Jose Rizo (wine and cheese $10 with 100% of the proceeds donated to Project Angel Food); or John Pisano’s Jazz Guitar Night at Lucy’s 51 in Toluca Lake at 8p.
Additionally on Tuesday June 12th from 7:15p-10:15p, there are spots open for single professionals ages 40-59, brave enough to assume that leap of faith by attending a Pre-Dating Speed Dating Event, at Damon’s Steak House 317 N. Brand Blvd. Glendale CA 91203. Tickets are $31.00 in advance, however, if you mention The Patch, you’ll receive a $3.00 discount.
Pre-Dating’s Speed Dating gatherings are the entertaining and efficient way to greet people from LA, face to face. Enjoy the wonderful atmosphere. Go on many 6-minute mini-dates with similarly minded, busy, available professionals, all in one evening!
Upcoming Speed Dating Events are: Wed June 13, Marina Del Rey, Women 26-36 Men 28-38; Tues June 26, LA Women 39-49 Men 32-52; Wed June 27, Studio City, Men and Women 29-39.
If you’re looking for something stimulating on Saturday, June 16th, join me and a room full of friendly folks from 10p-1a for the brilliant vocals of jazz notable Cathy Segal Garcia. No cover charge. Arrive early for fabulous, reasonably priced fare. Kitchen closes at 11pm.
The up close and personal ambience is an ideal locale to listen to stunning standards by Cathy, accompanied by her fantastic band “The Moment,” featuring Gary Fukushima, keyboards; Chuck Manning, sax; Brad Dutz, percussion; and Jeff Richman, guitar.
For art aficionados, you’re invited to a retrospective on Saturday June 16th, 5-8pm, celebrating renowned scenic artist Ben Lao (1947-2011), at the Gallery 800 in the Lankershim Arts Center, 5108 Lankershim, NoHo. Hosted bar; Food: Truck Norris; Music: Dino Bones.
Last but not least, on Father’s Day, Sunday June 17th from 6-8pm at Warner Center Park, catch a ‘Tribute to the Beatles – Ticket To Ride,’ presented by the Concert in the Park series.