You Say It's Your Birthday? The Dog Doesn't Care

Looking at Heidi’s sad birthday-hat photo to the right, one might assume the dog does not like birthdays.  Nothing could be further from the truth.  Heidi did this Conehead pose a few years ago -- not on the dog’s own birthday, but under duress for a card my husband Alan and I were planning to send to someone else.

The fact is, Heidi loves birthdays, but only if they happen to be hers.  That’s why she looks like the world is ending in the photo: it wasn’t. 

I was reminded of Heidi’s somewhat self-centered attitude in the week on my own birthday, Thursday, April 26, as I was opening my modest collection of presents. As always when any type of box, bag or large envelope is opened at our house, a delighted Heidi barged into the proceedings to see what she was getting.  She knew by smell there was nothing here as enticing as a doggie bag filled with leftover salmon or steak, but she knows that all sorts of other good things come in packages, like squeaky toys and tennis balls and new bandanas to add to her rainbow wardrobe. 

Since it was morning, I was opening stuff in bed -- the bed of which Heidi generously allows us each a few inches.  But Heidi did not wish me a wonderful day filled with joy, sunlight and really good cheeses from on Ventura.  Instead, once she realized that shiny wrapping paper was to be removed without her help from items not destined to become part of her own personal collection, the brat sighed, turned her back on me and rolled over onto the birthday cards for a snooze.  Why not crush them beyond all recognition? They weren’t for Heidi.

Regular readers of this column may remember .  When his mom, Deborah Kaye, called to wish me a happy birthday, I told her that Heidi had been sulking all morning over the fact that someone else’s birthday was happening in her vicinity.  “Unbelievable -- she’s so spoiled,” Deborah said, perhaps pleased to find some other dog had a problem.  Bruno wouldn’t even know what a present is, much less what to do with it. And of course Deborah is right – Bruno may be damaged, but spoiled he’s not.

But here’s the thing: Heidi, a rescue, probably spent her first birthday in the Texas storm drain where she was rescued, found playing Super Mom, trying to keep her puppies alive.  She certainly deserved her second birthday present here in Studio City, a mini without the bun (that became a sporadic tradition throughout ensuing years, although sometimes with the bun, eaten before we had a chance to remove it).  She also has done a spectacular job of protecting us all from cats and squirrels, and, when she received a check for $150 for appearing as an extra on Desperate Housewives, she put the whole amount toward her education. Plus, what 10-year-old doesn’t love a birthday fuss? 

So this year, instead of a getting a mini-Fat, Heidi would like to invite all of you and your dogs to her 10th Birthday Party, 2-4 p.m. Sunday May 6 at , the first doggie boutique Heidi visited upon her move from storm drain to Hollywood. Yes, Heidi is turning 10, and she wants to share the fun with the Patch staff and their dogs, as well as the loyal readers of A Paw in the Door.  See the attached flyer for details on this red-carpet event coming soon to dog-friendly Studio City, where my own unscientific survey suggests that doggie day care facilities may outnumber sushi bars (well, maybe not). Amongst ourselves, Heidi and I refer to this star-studded upcoming bash as HeidiFest 2012. 

And you’ve got to admit, a birthday party is less obnoxious than a doggie wedding or a “bark mitzvah.” 

Party activities to be announced – but anonymous sources tell me there may be giveaways to those who can answer important dog questions compiled by the Patch staff.  Some of these may include “Heidi Facts” you’ll find in our columns and her bio – so bone up.

I was going to let Heidi write today’s column, but all she could come up with was presents presents presents presents presents presents!  We admire her enthusiasm, but -- no presents for the dog.  If you want to do something for Heidi’s birthday, just do something nice for animals:  adopt, donate, train, whatever works for you.  And of course, come to the party.

EDITOR'S NOTE: You are all invited to come to Heidi's Birthday! There will be free goodies for your dog. You can get a free photo taken by a professional photographer with your dog, or you and Heidi, or just you! Get some free gifts of all kinds, for you and your dog. Get prizes from the dog trivia contest, be entertained and get interviewed on the red carpet by our columnist

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